I feel as though, with the way the Lord has designed me, I understand things best with illustrations. So speaking in a way, for example, that constructs a mental picture!
I remember hearing a song called The Swan (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JO5QYvxcvi4) and it was immaculate… I mean, absolutely breathtaking. It sounded like what I craved my motherhood would feel like to my children! It sounded like the slow spill of the colors of a sunrise and it felt like the strong embrace in the arms of the one you feel safest with. It brought tears to my eyes because it moved my heart so vividly! That melodious compilation of skilled notes dipped in emotions changed my entire mentality that day and therefore gave me a new direction in my prayers! The Lord, obviously, understands what I mean, even if I didn’t/still don’t fully understand what that (motherhood as a song) looks like, but I have full faith in the fact that He has put this desire in my heart and He will help me see it to completion.
I am almost 2 years into my zestful journey in Motherhood and my experience is bursting with contentment and a deep joy I never would have learned if it were not for the Lord walking me through certain trials of dying to myself and showing me what it looks like to parent with abandon with a smile on your face and, more importantly, in your heart as well. Motherhood is refreshing to the senses, it’s been hard at times having to adjust and teach but to force yourself to see Life in Rosy Hues (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sKJ9bvdgNvk the English lyrics in this one are enchanting, I used it as a lullaby) is a skill that I will continue to press into until I master it.
This morning my younger brother called me to tell me about a song he heard, L’appuntamento by Ornella Vanoni (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4nhDtkzhRg English lyrics in this one aren’t the focus but moreso the melody!) He said that the calmness and comfort of the song reminded him of my daughter and me and that while he was driving through the rain thinking of us, he felt the tears start to swell in his eyes!
This feels like one of the deepest encouragements from the Lord to me. Especially because, if you knew me before I was saved, as he did, then you know how severely intricate the Lord's rewiring of me has been! It makes tears start to swell in my eyes right now, because the Lord is giving me tangible evidence of how He’s keeping His promise to guide me through this, and it roots my faith deeper in my knowing that He will continue to refine me and make me more and more beautiful, more and more kind, more and more gentle, more patient, long-suffering, reliable, resilient, and peaceful.
As I go through my week with my daughter at my feet and another soon-to-be here, I will listen to these songs and sway under their cool frequencies with my heart full of joy and deep in a wordless prayer for the Lord to continue to make me into the woman He’s calling me to be.
I’ll laugh because of my daughter's smile, and then laugh even harder because of what my beautiful girl looks like when she mimics me dancing!
Life is full of wonder. It always will be, despite circumstance because God is good and He always has been.
I’m praying that if you’re reading this, then the soundtrack to your life will be one of slowness, resilience, and grace. We are the Gatekeepers of our homes! If our soundtrack is a lovely one, then the whole house will be lovely and so will the people inside of it.
Choose to see the color in order to live vibrantly!